Monday, October 13, 2014

Which Wich

My girlfriend wanted to go to Which Wich, this new sandwich shop. But it’s actually a franchise, there’s a few of them around. So I was like, “Well, which Which Wich did you want to go to?”

And she was like, “The one where the manager is an actual witch.” And I was like, “Well, that’s all of them. Everyone knows Which Wich is a Wiccan company. If you look on the bottom of your cup, they have inspirational quotes from The Craft. So, which Which Wich witch are you referring to?”

And she was like, “This witch has dreams of being really great at basketball. Like, she wants to always make the shot, always shoot nothing but net.” And I was like, “I don’t know, that still doesn’t quite narrow it down for me. Which Which Wich witch’s wishes for swishes did you have in mind, specifically?”

And she said, “Let’s just go to Subway.” And I was like, “Well, which Subway?”

Friday, October 10, 2014

Taken Sequels

I’m very excited that a new Taken movie is coming out, and I’m even more excited that it is called TAK3N. I hope they continue making Taken movies forever. Here is a list of potential titles.
TAKEN
TAKEN 2 (aka Even Takener, or 2Taken 2Furious)
TAK3N
T4KEN
TAK5N
TAKEN 6: The Takening
TAKEN 7: Taken Care of Business
TAKEN 8: The Taken of Pelham 1-2-3
TAKEN 9: Look Who’s Taken
TAKEN 10: Look Who’s Taken Too
TAKEN 11: Why Hast God Fortaken Me?
TAKEN 12: In Space
TAKEN 13: Donated (Prequel)
TAKEN 14: The Grey
TAKEN 15: Look Who’s Taken Now
TAKEN 16: Taken Takes Manhattan
TAKEN 17: Ransom starring Mel Gibson
TAKEN 18: Taken It Easy For Awhile
TAKEN 19: Taken Bake
TAKEN 20: Take Anything You Want, I’m Through Fighting

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Inside/Outside LA

My friend Brian Barlow made this very funny short film/potential web series, and it's really great, and I appear in it a couple times as a lactose intolerant.

Thursday, September 4, 2014

What do you like about Chatroulette?



I tried to interview people to get testimonials about how cool Chatroulette is, for a Chatroulette-themed Sleepaway Camp show. Thanks to Travis Rust for inspiration.